new beginnings

its a weird feeling.

leaving everything I've ever known.

leaving my best friends and family and knowing that i wont see them until at least christmas.

i didnt think it would be this hard to leave loved ones.

what scares me the most is the unknown. i dont know what life is going to be like without them.

i have a problem with time.

i cant comprehend it.

part of me feels like this really isnt happening, that tomorrow i will wake up in my old bed again, and later in the afternoon i will get to hangout with my best friends after eating a 6:30 breakfast with my family.

but thats not what will happen.

and it doesnt make sense.

everytime I try to understand the concept of time…

i cant.

its like everytime i try to understand the fact that one day i will get to live FOREVER with my creator. i get confused and my brain just starts to hurt and i just give up. so i dont think about my time here. im trying to focus on each moment, and living fully in it.

a lot can happen in a year.

this past year i have changed in many ways and many of things have happened.

i decided to not go to college, deepened many relationships, tore my ACL, learned to trust God in many ways, and had to say goodbye to everyone i love.

i am on my second day of 365. i cant wait to see whats going to happen in this next year, and what God has for me.

hopefully i dont die of emotional unstablement before this year is up.