trust

Why is it that we are constantly thinking ahead.

Not content here, enjoying the life we have been given.

Living fully focused in the present is a hard thing for most people.

But the hardest part of that for me is not knowing the future.

I have so many things I want to do with my life, that I am unable to focus on the now.

So many thoughts running through my head about my future.

What do I do?

Do I go to college, or do a discipleship program.

Or do I go for my dream and start backpacking the world, loving on kids, and then maybe I’ll find a place to start a children’s home.

Why is it so hard to just give over those thoughts and trust him with the outcome.

Maybe cause I'm human and its natural to push God away by not trusting him and not letting him be in control of my life.

I think I put limitations on God, because of my dreams, and cause I can’t always see the steps falling into place.

Even though that’s stupid.

Cause so many people told me that moving to another country after high school, by my self wasn’t going to happen. But I trusted, and he provided and overcame so many obstacles that I thought I was going to have to conquer myself. Which is weird and awesome.

But sometimes I feel that what I want to do will never happen. Cause I'm currently 18, single and a female. And in my mind, that screams, KIDNAP ME. Especially if I'm traveling by myself.

I don’t know.
GOD IS SO MUCH BIGGER THAN ME!

But it’s still tough to not be concerned.

For now I'm learning to trust him and focus on the moments.